Weekly Roundup @ 9-1-1

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Some of this weeks more memorable calls:

#1. A woman found her horse, and wants a Deputy to help her pick it up.  Trouble is, is it really her horse?  You see, it’s been missing for a while, and she’s just located it at a rental stable.  She goes into a long story that basically boils down to – her daughter took the horse that she (the daughter) considered hers, after Mom and Dad went through a nasty divorce.  Daughter took the horse to a boarding stable, and didn’t tell Mom where it was.  Mom finally found out, and went to claim “her” horse (she “paid for it, fed it, has the papers”) and is upset the stable owners won’t let her take it, even going so far as to change the lock on the gate!  (How dare they?!?!)  Of course, the stable owners only have her word on it, as far as they know, the person paying the stable rental fees is the actual owner.  Woman wants the Deputy to help her take “her” horse.

Not going to happen.  Settle it in court.  Woman not happy, will call back later.

#2. Drunk woman sobbing on the phone.  She’s been abandoned by her kids somewhere in California!  She doesn’t know where she is!  Help her!  She tells me she’s on Highway 198.  OK, Highway 198 is close to a hundred miles from end to end!  Where on Highway 198??  She doesn’t know!  She’s near a Chevron station.  (We see from the cell tower address that she’s got to be close to Three Rivers, but that still leaves a lot of area to cover)

After about an hour of trying to get her to figure out where she is, and multiple calls of her sobbing and hanging up on us, we track it down.  She’s drunk. Very drunk. She wandered away from a local bar, her ‘significant other’ got tired of her and left her there and returned to his hotel room.  We finally got her back to the room with ‘hubby’ (or whoever) and tucked in for the night.  Oh.. the wonders of alcohol!

#3. Gangster wanna-be (and stupid with a capital S) teenager tries to shoot at someone, but misses.  Three targets, in close proximity, and he’s got a shotgun.  Lucky for the intended targets, this dip is a lousy shot, and misses all of them!  That’s one reason our gang related shootings only sometimes result in serious injury or death – the shooters are all really bad shots!

#4. Better shot in front of the ‘stop and rob’ along the freeway.  A call that we originally thought was an armed robbery with shots fired turned out to be a fight in the parking lot that escalated into someone grabbing their shotgun and blasting away.  Everyone was gone before we got units on the scene, including the victim, but he showed up at a local hospital fairly quickly.  Detectives still tracking down this one, but they’ve got some good intel, so it’s probably only a matter of time.

It was a slow week, maybe the weather kept them in.  More later.

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Last few minutes at work, first day back after a short vacation.  Not a very busy night, thank goodness.  One crazy call late, guy calling a small Texas Police Department and making obscene comments to the dispatcher.  They called us after they tracked down the cell phone’s location and asked us to see if we could find him.  He’s apparently made dozens of calls to them tonight, saying he “wanted pussy”, in both english and spanish.  I left before he was located, so I don’t know if we solved that problem or not.  You just never know what will pop up.

If Only…

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STOP! In the name of the law!

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Y'all are in a heap 'O trouble, boy!

It really annoys me to see stuff like this.  I mean, really, it’s just embarrassing.

A press release at our agency’s website reads:

Deputies conducted a traffic stop on an unoccupied vehicle

I’m pretty sure you can’t conduct a traffic stop on an unoccupied vehicle.  Unless that whole Transformers thing was actually a documentary, and not science fiction,  there’s just no way to make that work.

I don’t understand why we let things like that get out.  Just how do you stop an unoccupied vehicle?

9-1-1, what is your emergency? (enter)

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The FCC is working on plans to allow texting, picture, and video communications with 9-1-1 centers.  It will require a revamping of the system from circuit-switched to IP based technology.  That, of course, isn’t going to be cheap.  We’ll see if Congress supplies the funding for such a rebuilding of the system.

This should be fun.  If it ever happens here, I’ll keep you updated.

You’ll NOT put a towel down on MY floor, by Gawd!

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At least she didn’t call 9-1-1….

But she did call the Sheriff’s Office because her roommate told her she couldn’t put a towel on the floor while she took a shower.  They actually got into a heated argument about it, to the point where shower girl called the cops!  The other half fled before the Deputy arrived, so not much got resolved.  We don’t even know if towel girl got to take her shower,  bare floor or not.

 

You think you had a bad day?

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It’s not often we feel sorry for the “bad guy”, but this time it’s a near thing.

Here’s tonight’s story of a poor guy who just can’t catch a break….

He was released from prison early in the day.  He gets back to Tulare County, and just about the first thing that happens is he gets stopped by a deputy, who proceeds to do what we call an “FI”, a field interview (or interrogation).  After that, the two “buddies” with him apparently blame him for being harassed by the cops, so after the deputies have gone they decide to start beating the crap out of him.  Someone sees that, and calls 9-1-1, and the deputies head back to intervene.  Of course, once they get back on scene, the “buddies” have flown the coop, and our poor “bad guy” is sporting some bruises and scratches.  “Bad guy” refuses medical help, and is not interested in prosecuting his “buddies”.  Since he won’t cooperate, and his injuries are not severe, the deputies leave.  Some time later, but not much, “bad guy”, who is now on foot, gets hit by a car!  Of course, it’s hit and run, and the driver gets away.  9-1-1 gets called again, and deputies, CHP, and an ambulance are dispatched.

While our just-released ex-con is laying on the road, waiting for the ambulance and the cops to arrive, someone decides to kick the crap out of him!  Of course, THEY take off before the good guys arrive, and we don’t have any arrests (so far) for either the hit and run, or the assault.  To add insult to his now many injuries, his common-law wife takes all his money, his last 3 bucks, out of his pocket, and leaves him laying in the road!  By this time a crowd had gathered, and when the deputies, ambulance, EMTs, and CHP arrive, they tell them of the last few minutes of our poor “bad guy’s” day.

So let’s recap: Gets out of prison. Gets stopped by the cops.  Gets beat up by “friends”.  Gets hit by a car.  Gets kicked senseless (or more senseless than the hit and run caused) by one or more individuals while he’s laying in the road.  His “girlfriend” rummages through his pockets, and takes his last $3!  Once help arrives, he ends up being helicoptered to Fresno for emergency medical treatment.

In what might be the only good news in this story, the “girlfriend/common law wife” was arrested for being under the influence, and for robbery.  She sits in jail as he lays in the hospital.

It’s almost enough to make you feel sorry for him.  Almost.

Compared to this, I don’t think I’ve ever had a bad day.

I can hear you now!

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I’m back at work after an almost European vacation of 5 weeks. It’s all coming back to me.

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“Obvious signs of death”

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From a recent press release, posted on a publicly viewable website of a local law enforcement agency:

Units were dispatched “for a body found in an abandoned vehicle…  Upon the deputies arrival the body had obvious signs of death.”

Obvious signs of death.

Maybe they let McGruff write this one.  Or maybe that’s being unfair to McGruff.

I really wish they’d run these things past someone who had at least a minor in English in college.  A criminology degree apparently isn’t enough.

 

Aww… Dammit!

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It’s not a matter of “if”, it’s a matter of “when”.  If you wear one of these devices, you WILL ,at some point, say something you wished you hadn’t.  And it will be heard by folks you’ll wish hadn’t.  A Southwest pilot had that experience earlier this year. His unhappiness with the dating pool was broadcast across air traffic control frequencies when either his push to talk button got stuck, or he forgot to reconfigure his headset for intercom rather than radio.  Whatever caused the mishap, he let loose to his co-pilot, expressing his frustration with the number of gay and older flight attendants.  Apparently he can’t get laid unless the object of his affections is a young lady also wearing the Southwest blazer.  Perhaps he needs to expand his horizons!

I’ve been caught a time or two by open microphones.  Luckily, I don’t talk about my “dating” life at work!

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