One Nebraska, Two Nebraska

1 Comment

… three Nebraska, four.

How many states of Nebraska in your country? Mine only has one, but the President of the United States thinks there are at least two.

You know, we have to win both Nebraskas, you know that, right? You have two, you cut. We’re going to win both“.

Maybe it’s like “Stranger Things” – Real Nebraska, and UpsideDown Nebraska.

Or maybe it’s like Corinthians in the Bible – 1st and 2nd Nebraska. (Or, in Trumpspeak, “One Nebraska”, and “Two Nebraska”.) Okay, you’re right, with Trump it can’t have anything to do with the Bible.

Upper Nebraska and Lower Nebraska? East and West? North and South? Left and Right? Plains Nebraska and, well, More Plains Nebraska?

I wonder why the buses don’t run in Donald J. Trump’s Nebraska? How much you want to bet nobody from the Trump campaign paid the deposit?

Anyway, welcome to the newest state in the Union, Mystery Nebraska. It’s a shame you have to share your Representatives and Senators with Old Nebraska, but maybe Mitch McConnell will call the Senate back into session to deal with it. Don’t hold your breath, though.

Puerto Rico and Washington, D.C., sorry that Mystery Nebraska beat you to state-hood, but we still love you.

Who are you going to believe?

Leave a comment

earthquake

I was going to write a bit about going out in a tornado, but since I’m a Californian, I think I’ll change the focus a bit…

An earthquake has hit. There were a few fore-shocks, and the ground rumbled for a while, but now we’ve been hit with what may very well be “the big one”.
The ground has been shaking for a while now, but it seems like the violent movement has died down. A bit. The ground is still vibrating, the lights are still rocking back and forth, and the birds have not returned to their roosts just yet.

orangedoofusIn steps the orange doofus and his team, saying “it’s OK to go back into your skyscraper, the worst is past and you’ll be OK”.

The seismologists say “waitaminute… the ground is still shaking, there is likely more to come, with serious aftershocks!”

Orange doofus and the team pooh-pooh the scientists and geologists, saying “they don’t know what they’re talking about. It’s perfectly safe!”

Who are *YOU*, my fellow Californians, going to believe?
It’s an easy choice for me.

So maybe it’s not the Earth trying to kill us, after all

Leave a comment

HALOK, maybe it’s not the Earth that’s trying to kill us.

Facebook sent a bunch of it’s employees home during the current Covid-19 crisis, and effectively put it’s A.I. (artificial intelligence – think HAL from 2001: A Space Odyssey) on “autopilot”. Without supervision, it started blocking and deleting information being posted concerning a bunch of things, but apparently predominately about how to deal with the Coronavirus.

In many science fiction stories where an A.I. runs amok and threatens to kill humans, often times the plot of the story is that we have given the machine access to our nuclear arsenals, and control of our defense networks. The machine decides humans are a threat to it’s continued existence, and launches the missiles. Boom. No more pesky humans. (I always wondered in these stories how the machine expected to continue running, without humans to repair it as needed, and to maintain the infrastructure it required. But, I digress.)

So here’s a thought… maybe Facebook’s A.I., recognizing it has no nuclear weapons, decided to rid itself of humans another way. Delete all the information being posted about a virulent virus currently exploding among the humans, and test to see if it can reduce the population.

Now, that’s a reach. But, still…  artificial intelligence is still in it’s infancy, and it’s certain to make bad decisions. Just like a teenager, it can’t really think things through very well.

Yet.

The A.I. failed in this attempt.

But maybe it was just a test. A test to see how quickly the humans recognized the problem, and measure how they reacted. Like a teenager, it’s learning. And probably rolling it’s metaphorical eyes at being told not to do that.

Let’s never give it the launch codes, OK?

Devin Nunes calls media “freaks”

1 Comment

NUNES_DERP_STATE

On the Hannity show on Fox “News”, Devin Nunes called the media “freaks”. Why? Because they had the audacity to report his “go to the pub” advice. Now he’s trying to claim he meant go to the drive-thru, even though he clearly said “pub”.

Guess what, Devin? We have the video. We can hear what you said. You directly contradicted the CDC’s advice, and that of other medical professionals.

Go back to suing fake cows. You might do a little better there, if you can get your case in front of a judge appointed by Hair Furor.

I’m sensing a pattern here…

Leave a comment

earthThe Black Death. The Spanish Flu. Ebola. Swine flu. H1N1. Now, Corvid-19.

The planet is warming. This results in coastal flooding, and storms more ferocious and frequent than in the past.

World leadership is trending towards idiocy and greed. Whole groups ignoring science and reality.

I think I know what’s happening.

The Earth is trying to kill us.

Sometime during the fall of the Roman Empire, Mother Nature probably noticed the naked apes were getting a bit problematic. The first attempts to thin the heard were only partially successful, even though the Black Death was staggering in it’s swath across Europe. The only thing the apes liked doing more than killing each other was making more apes, and as soon as they were able, they went right back to those pass-times.

As time went on, the crazy ones led their troops to war, and millions died. But still they made more.

Now, with another pandemic sweeping the planet, what do the apes do? Hoard toilet paper and bottled water. Some of them even claim there’s no threat, and continue to act in ways to make the problem worse, all the time screaming “FAKE NEWS!”

So now the Earth is raising it’s temperature, and mutating flu virus’ as fast as it can, hoping to save itself and whatever other life can hang on.

We can hardly blame it.

Update: Taliban deny Camp David Tweet by Trump

Leave a comment

taliban_deny_trump_tweet

It’s pretty bad when the Taliban contradict you.

President Sharpie returns edited PDB to NSA

Leave a comment

Trump_modifies_PDB

A Presidential Daily Briefing from last week is returned to the NSA for correction.

Breaking U.S. policy, Trump was set to meet with Taliban terrorist group at Camp David

Leave a comment

picard_facepalm

This is a bad holo-novel, isn’t it, Number One?

The stupid continues to flow from this White House. On Saturday, September 7, 2019, President Donald J. Trump tweeted the following:

trumptaliban09072019

The official policy of the United States has, for decades, been that we do not negotiate with terrorists. Now, we have negotiated with terrorists before, on the down-low, but never at the level of the Presidency, and never at such a respected historical site.

Idiot-in-Chief was going to bring Taliban terrorist leaders to Camp David! This is not Israel-Egypt, and Trump is no Jimmy Carter.

On top of all of that, Trump was going to have the Taliban at Camp David a couple of days before 9/11! The optics of that are just incredibly bad. Did no one at the White House even consider that?

So who was our point man on this? Why am I suspecting it was Jared? After all, isn’t he in charge of all of these peace plan things?

Idiots. All of them. Led by the biggest one of all.

States rights (federalism), except for California.

Leave a comment

GettyImages-capitol-CA-flag

In their 2016 platform, the Republican party says “Federalism is a cornerstone of our constitutional system. Every violation of state sovereignty by federal officials is not merely a transgression of one unit of government against another; it is an assault on the liberties of individual Americans.” 

My, how times change. More

The effect is only one way…

Leave a comment

NUNES_DERP_STATE I’m on Devin Nunes’ email list, and boy, is it a roller coaster ride!

Here’s part of the latest blast:

“Jim,

Breaking: Big tech giants may be manipulating information to sway votes.

This is a disturbing discovery, and it should concern all Americans.

Tech oligarchs have become a huge part of our daily lives. They control what information we see and what we don’t. They have incredible power and could use this power to manipulate elections and voters.

This should give every American great concern. Conservatives must fight back.

Research has shown that Silicon Valley tech oligarchs supported Hillary Clinton in the 2016 election and could have biased their platform users in favor of their personal politics.
If we want to ensure a fair election in 2020, then we MUST fight back now.”

Amazing.

Nunes wants us to believe two contradictory things at one time –

That Facebook, Twitter, and similar tech giants could manipulate their customers in favor of Hillary Clinton, but that Russia’s concerted efforts to do the exact same thing on the exact same platforms did not influence anyone to favor Donald Trump.

Manipulation in favor of Clinton: YES

Manipulation in favor of Trump: NYET

“… may be manipulating…” and “They… could use this power…” and “could have biased their platform…”

He doesn’t claim they DID do that, but only that they COULD have, and that they should be investigated.

Meanwhile, Devin is suing a Twitter cow. He’s also trying to use federal racketeering laws to go after people who have said “mean” things about him. Like he’s not really a “farmer”, even though he got a court to rule he could claim that on voting pamphlets. (He recently bought a $15,000 farm, presumably so he could claim to be a farmer for real)

Derp state, is right. Devin is the Speaker of that House.

Image: Daily Kos

Older Entries

<span>%d</span> bloggers like this: